I am diffusing these two oils today. They are meant for helping with traumatic events and helping with spiritual matters. I put several things in this picture. Of course I showed the oils used but I chose to put them with my Goddess doll that represents me and a picture of my great grandmother and her family. The tree in the background was Annika's tree. It is a willow representing her watery weak nature. I wish I could cut it down but the tree never hurt anyone and it is soaking up water from a wet spot in the yard. The trauma I am dealing with involves all of these objects. I desperately want to deface my doll and remove the beads that represent three of my children that I no longer claim. Maybe I will just cover those beads with cloth like they died when I add Sophia's bead when she is born. The doll is beautiful like the tree. As for the picture of my great grandmother Ines I placed it in the photo because she holds meaning for me. I am a bit out of place in my family. I don't quite look like anyone in my family except Ines. I have mentioned her before especially last October when I visited her grave. I never met her. She died the year I was born. The meaning she holds for me today is in her name. I haven't 100% decided on a middle name for Sophia. I would like to honor Ines but her name just doesn't flow for me.... hence my dilemma.
Later this day I got two messages supposedly from Annika. They were worded like they came from her father though. They were also sent at a time when she should have been in school. The main reason I let her go and live with her father was so I would never have to deal with him and his abusive nature. To get messages from him veiled like they came from Annika is another trauma to my day. Some children leave their mothers when they are 18. Some when they are 30. She just happened to be 11. It was her choice. Who was I to stop her?
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